Tuesday, January 13, 2009

The Glory Of It All

Three years ago on this date, Hamp and I willingly and we believe, obediently, gave our daughter to be married to a man who had won her heart and ours. Almost two years ago, we struggled with her to make sense of his abandonment and subsequent divorce from her. A year ago, we were living fully in the reality that life hadn't turned out the way we thought it would and all that we held secure was gone...even our understanding of God.

Today, the facts haven't changed and yet everything has. My heart knows less about God, but what I do know, I know for sure. Sometimes I'm still sad at the loss of all we had dreamed about experiencing with Tiffany as a married woman with her own family. And sometimes I'm still angry at how the self-centeredness of another person could hurt so many lives. But mostly, I am in awe of God's faithfulness to us all and the beauty He is bringing out of the ashes of pain.

Tiffany has her own story to tell of God's faithfulness to her specifically and I encourage you to check it out here.

As her mother, and as one who loved her husband like he was my own, I have fought different battles than she has. Betrayal, rejection, pain, anger, and questions have been my frequent companions these last two years. But just as with Pilgrim on his journey, Hope has come along in recent months and begun to overpower her enemies.

I am humbled at the arrogance I had as I viewed God and how I kept Him in a box that made me feel safe. Along with Lucy as she first met Aslan the Lion, I know now that He is most certainly not safe, but He is good.

As cliche' as this might sound, it's really not about me at all. God has a far bigger story He is writing and only by His doing am I given the grace to be a part of it. I don't know why He allowed our dreams to be shattered, but those pieces have led us to just a tiny bit of understanding that He will be glorified in whatever He allows. His will, and His will alone, is what matters and peace can only come through a yielded heart and bowed head.

So while the marriage that Tiffany waited expectantly for didn't last, she is still a radiant bride waiting for her faithful Bridegroom who truly will never leave or forsake her...or us.

For that, we rejoice and thank God for the "The Glory of it All".


Betty Anne said...

Thank you for the reminder, Jill. I hear your heart, know you speak honestly, and I admire you hugely!
I love you, Friend.

Glenda said...

I read Tiffany's post the other day, and was truly in awe of the beauty coming out of the ashes in her life. Tiffany absolutely shines with Jesus.

I see the same beauty shining from your own heart as her mother. The wounds of your heart go deep and you have faced them with such courage.

The "why" of it all may baffle us until eternity, but what a joy it is to know that you and Tiffany are secure in the arms of our Sovereign Lord Jesus who holds all the answers. Until the answers come to the "why" of this pain, I pray He will continually pour His comfort into your hearts!!!!

Glenda said...

Loved the David Crowder song too!